A Lesson in Temptation & Planning Ahead

We’ve all been tempted. When you’re on a diet, though, temptation is literally EVERY WHERE.

Case in point: I wake up a little late for class, and I still have to print a handout for my presentation. Now, I have a dilemma. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Especially when it is the first and only chance you have to eat until 1:45pm. BUT, so is getting a good grade on my class presentation, getting a good grade in my class and graduating from college. Obviously, it was an easy choice to skip breakfast so that I could get to class in time with the handout.

I don’t get to class on time (bad way to start a presentation) but it wasn’t because I stopped to eat breakfast. It just so happens that my printer was being a *blip* and wouldn’t print what I needed. Different story, different blog. It was a good thing that my professor likes me, because she graded my presentation without penalty.  Now that I know I did well on my presentation, the day is starting to look MUCH better. But I’m hungry now, and the last thing I needed was my stomach growling during my Philosophy of the Mind class (if my stomach growled, and there was no one around to hear it, did my stomach REALLY growl?) or during my Metaphysics class (was it my choice not to eat breakfast that caused my stomach to growl, or was my stomach growl AND my choice not to eat breakfast pre-determined by past events and therefore not really a choice of freewill at all?). Believe me when I say…. I was tempted.

I was tempted to grab a we-can’t-possibly-pile-any-more-cheese-on-this-bun burger. (Allow me to create an aside to tell you that my campus is SURROUNDED by fast food joints. There’s a McDonalds, a Burger King, a Wendy’s, and an Arby’s all within 50 feet of the building I was in). Now, I don’t know if this was done just to tempt my willpower…. but believe me it was HELL. And to top it off, I only had 15 minutes in between class if I really did want to eat. You mean, I could buy a burger and some fries, get it in 5 minutes and still have 10 minutes to wolf it down? Ohhhh, the temptation. And at 11am, ALL the resturaunts are preparing for lunch. So the air was alive with smell-good temptation.

I ultimately decided against fast food. My stomach did growl in Philosophy of Mind (if my stomach growls, and all the students have been lulled to sleep by boredom, did my stomach really growl?). Apparently no one was paying attention, I got no funny looks. When 1:45pm came around, I was HUNGRY! And again tempted… but once you overcome temptation, it makes it easier to overcome the second time. I came home and had a healthy, satisfying and all-together delicious turkey roll-up. Life was good! Life IS good!

So, the moral of the story is: don’t put yourself in a situation that could end with giving in to unhealthy. Plan ahead. Had I packed a lunch the night before, I could have grabbed it on my way out the door, and had lunch between classes.

By the way: It has been a week since I first started my diet. I am now 5 lbs lighter… WOOO! So take THAT temptation and SHOVE it!

Not Tomorrow, Today!

Hi! My name is Dominique…. and I’m Fat.

O.K. if you don’t know the drill, this is where you come in and say something to the effect of:

Hi Dominique! —Hello Dominique! —Whaaaddduup? —How you doin?

Then, I smile and wonder why the hell I came to a Fatties Anonymous meeting. I mean, I’m not fat…. AM I??? And I’ll feel my ego imploding. I’ll hyper-ventilate because I can’t believe I just admitted I’m FAT!

No, wait. I admitted I’m fat, and not just to myself (which is kind of O.K. because in the back of my mind I KNEW I was fat), but I admitted I’m fat to total strangers. I’m admitting I’m fat to people who walk past me as I try to pull my shirt away from my stomach, as if having a stretched out piece of fabric hanging limply from my body would hide the fact that I am fat. I’m admitting I’m fat to my classmates who watch me squeeze myself into a school desk, and sure I fit in the desk, but just barely. I’m tucked in so closely that when I go to leave, I’ll have a red line across the part of my belly that spent an hour and 15 minutes rubbing up against the desk. It’ll hurt. I’ll feel bad about myself for a little bit, but then when I’m hungry again. I’ll forget all about the shirts I’ve stretched out (beyond repair) just so that the fabric doesn’t accentuate my protruding belly. I’ll forget about the red line (that is still there) the desk caused.

Wait. The red line that I  caused. I caused it by not watching what I eat, by being too lazy to work out (OR even to park further away from the store. Instead I’ll wait 5 minutes for that lady to pack her groceries in the car, just so that I can get the closest parking spot to the grocery store). And when I look in the mirror and ask what happened to my svelte, athletic body, I’ll make up excuses.

I don’t have time to exercise (I’m busy with college, afterall!).

Healthy food is so much MORE expensive than this huge can of Chef-Boyardee Ravioli.

I have Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome, it’s making me fat.

My family genetics predisposes that I be fat.

And back at Fatties Anonymous, I’ll say: ”It’s been 1 day since I ate fried foods.”

You: Congrats! —Good Job!— Way to go! — Keep Going!

For a brief moment, I will feel good about myself, because you are here to give me support and encouragement. I will feel part of a group. I won’t be alone. But once I get home, you won’t be looking over my shoulder. I won’t feel accountable to you, because you’re not here. I’ll eat things I know I shouldn’t, and in my mind I’ll say:

I’ll just eat this today, and tomorrow I’ll start over. Tomorrow I’ll diet. Tomorrow I will start to feel better about myself and I’ll know I’m doing something good for myself.

And tomorrow never comes, because everyday is a today. That changes TODAY, today I’ll eat healthy. Today I’ll exercise.